Adjusting Your Wedding for a Micro Wedding

The time has come to gaze into the crystal ball and predict what your wedding day will be like.  Will life be back to normal?  Will guests be able to travel from other states or countries?  Will you be able to have dancing?  Is a 300 person guest list possible?  I wish that this blog was full of profound information that would answer all of those questions for you - but the fact is, none of us have the answers.  The wedding industry is a buzz every day with conversation about changing metrics and new information, but what we know for sure is - we don't know what will happen.  For now, we are continuing to coordinate small, intimate weddings at a rapid rate.  The wedding industry has gotten in the swing of accommodating smaller crowds safely, effectively and with spectacular end results.  Here are some tips on how to transition your plans to a bit more on the micro side.  

Credits: Dani LaRaia Photography, The Sablewood, Kenneth Cooper Films, Farmhouse Floral Design, My Bliss Events

Credits: Dani LaRaia Photography, The Sablewood, Kenneth Cooper Films, Farmhouse Floral Design, My Bliss Events

1. You Can Fit Almost Anywhere.

A major bonus to a small, micro wedding is that you have a lot of choices for the venue.  Large weddings limit you to sometimes only a handful of well-known spaces, but planning a more intimate event affords you so much more opportunity to explore places off the general radar - a meaningful restaurant, favorite art gallery, historic building, beautiful lake, picturesque rental home, family property, beautiful gardens - you see where I'm going here.   You are somewhat limitless in where you finally say "I do" when you don't have to worry about accommodating so many people.  Truly, we suggest finding the right spot before anything else.  Your location will dictate so many of your next decisions!

Credits: YTK Photography

Credits: YTK Photography

2.  Consider it a Destination

There are so many idyllic locations in Upstate New York that would be perfect as a destination location.  With 50 people or less, consider making your wedding an entire weekend of festivities.  The beauty of the Capital District, Saratoga Springs, Adirondack Mountains, Catskills, Fingerlakes, Hudson Valley and beyond is that no matter the season there is something to do  - especially outside.  Take full advantage of your favorite seasonal activity to bring your closest friends and family along for a drivable destination.  Your guests will appreciate the time you took to introduce them to something new and you will have a one of a kind wedding weekend that is truly all your own.

Credit: Cappy Hotchkiss Photography, Sanctuary farms, Mohican Flowers, By Design Films 

Credit: Cappy Hotchkiss Photography, Sanctuary farms, Mohican Flowers, By Design Films 

3. Minus One

When it comes to the guest list, that can get tricky.  Even before micro weddings became necessary, couples often struggled with keeping their wedding list down and we can appreciate how hard it is to limit yourself to only 50 people.  A reasonable request may be to leave the plus ones at home.  In all reality, this tight knit group of 50 will likely already be acquainted and feel comfortable mingling with each other as it is.  But just a thought to leave some guests who you may not even know at home.  In the end, it is your wedding and it's perfectly acceptable to prioritize your guests as needed, especially considering the circumstances.

Credits: Tom Wall Photography, The Sagamore Resort, Wendy Lawrence Events, Faye and Renee Event Design

Credits: Tom Wall Photography, The Sagamore Resort, Wendy Lawrence Events, Faye and Renee Event Design

4.  The Right "Stuff"

Like a well tested recipe, your vendor team makes up the flavor of your wedding - find the right people.  For such an intimate affair you are going to want to make sure you have the details covered.  Luckily you are able to spread your budget out over a smaller footprint, allowing you to pay closer detail to the things that really matter to you.  Rather than buying dinner for 200 and only affording chicken you can now move forward with the surf and turf of your dreams.  Instead of looking past the less than stylish tables, chairs and linens that were once your only choice you can now hand select the perfect collection of items to make your wildest Pinterest dreams come true.  You. Name. It.  Your vendors will help you navigate these decisions and show you how to adjust your initial plans down to the current guidelines as well as the opportunities you now have because things  have been paired down.  These small details will make a world of difference when you look back at photos years from now, noticing the careful selections, custom components, professional perfectionism that can come to life when you are working on a smaller scale.

Credit: Maisie Snyder Photography, Events to a T

Credit: Maisie Snyder Photography, Events to a T

5. You Don't Have to Stick to a Script

Let's be honest - everything is different right now.  You don't have to follow a traditional wedding program.  If you don't want a wedding party or you want to have a brunch instead of a dinner - do that.  It's actually quite freeing to remove the shackles of the standing wedding program from your wrist and really allow yourself to dream of what feels right and fits you.  Weddings were never meant to be one size fits all, and this was perhaps the greatest victory of this forced shirt.  We have seen couples become incredibly creative and highlight aspects of their relationship and personality that we would have never been able to see otherwise.  There really are no rules or expectations anymore so you are free to design your day(s) how you wish, and that is a beautiful thing.  Give yourself permission to think outside of the box.

Credit: JB Photography

Credit: JB Photography

6. Embrace Change

Much like the weather, regulations, restrictions and recommendations are changing all the time.  Planning something for a date 6 months in the future may show you a number of challenges as adjustments are required.  Your vendors will be by your side to help you, but in the end the choices will be yours.  At times it may feel like the only words you hear are "no" or "I'm sorry" but we promise it's not for a lack of trying.  Your wedding vendors will give you the best day that they can, in the safest way possible - of that you can be sure.  Make a list of the 5 most important things about your wedding and keep it in your pocket.  If a day comes where you start to feel like you are compromising too much on your dream, take it out and review it.  A lot of times the heaviness of what is going on can taint these moments, but we have truly seen some of the most satisfied and happy clients during this time.  People who never thought they would have a small wedding or be happy with the edited version of the event they wanted were amazed at how much more time they got to spend with their guests and how much more they appreciated the food and design choices they made after they were able to focus the budget on a smaller footprint.  While it's perfectly ok to grieve the wedding you initially planned, give yourself the grace to embrace the wedding you still get to have.

Credit: YTK Photography, Lakota Farms, Blooms Floral Design, SBM event Co, Suburban Kitchen

Credit: YTK Photography, Lakota Farms, Blooms Floral Design, SBM event Co, Suburban Kitchen

7.  Treat Yo Self.

Nobody ever said life was fair - but they did say to treat yourself.  Serve your favorite meal, have an over the top cocktail hour, go overboard on specialty cocktails, hire the photographer you stalk on Instagram, go bolder on your centerpiece, create custom favors - do it up.  You won't regret it.  You will love your choices and you will feel confident walking into your wedding day knowing that everything about it is your most favorite ever.  Could you have done that with 200 guests?  Well, probably not.  But you can pull it off with 50 - so go on with your bad self.  You deserve it.

Credit: Michelle Lange Photo, Kelly Strong Events, The Adelphi hotel, Olive and June Floral co

Credit: Michelle Lange Photo, Kelly Strong Events, The Adelphi hotel, Olive and June Floral co

8. Make it Personal.

Ask your guests what their favorite things are - meals, drinks, appetizers, music - throw in these thoughtful touches and knock their socks off.  You get 50 of your most beloved friends and family together and you get to spoil yourself and everyone around you - that's pretty special.  This is an opportunity like no other, go ahead and have fun with that.  

At the end of the day, there is no right or wrong way to get married.  The definition of the perfect day is different for every couple, both before the virus and after.  No matter what you decide to do, how you decide to celebrate, who you decide to invite, and where you decide to host your event - be sure of one thing - that it feels right.  Much like your partner, sometimes the last place you think you will find happiness is exactly where it has been waiting for you.  Don't discount that you still have the opportunity to be a bride or a groom, that you still get to stand with your chosen person and make a beautiful and meaningful commitment to one another.  As long as you have each other, you have everything the big wedding has!

Need help adjusting your wedding theme to a micro wedding? Fill out our pre-consult form to schedule a meeting with one of our Event Specialists!

Melissa CarrierComment